Waking Finnegan

“We are such stuff as dreams are made of, and our whole life is rounded with a sleep” ~ Shakespeare

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Location: zurich, Switzerland

Sunday, January 15, 2006

Oma God Dream


Poking my fingers through a linty hole inside the left pocket of my leather jacket. I'm searching for a tram ticket which I'm sure I'd purchased---where is it? The tram is heading my way, disrupting orderly puffs of steam that rise through vents at the edge of the canal. It is a European city, but neither Venice nor Amsterdam. I'm scanning the street signs and store windows for a clue, but everything is lit up in English. Trying to remember the canals in London. Did Dickens ever mention any canals?

In the near distance, I can see the tram passing a series of curb vents emitting steam. As it passes the last one, I remember about my ticket and continue fingering through the lintballs and sand deposits.

The vehicle looks different upon closer inspection. The front---shaped like the prow of a ship---gives the crowd of people around me a rush as it proceeds to pass. Gleaming and filled with demi-monde hustlers in suits, the first set of cars glides past, sloshing up a miniature set of beach breakers over my shoes. Everyone reacts in spontaneous disapproval to this sole-soaking. What sort of city is this? What town would create a hybrid oddity that moves along underwater tracks and whose eddies wet the tramsters and make the curbs disappear? Perhaps one of the Hanseatic cities like Novgorod or Bruges? (Here I am half-awake wondering about Hamburg, and if I saw anything there that led me to this Hanseatic thread.)

I feel very cold. I'm worried about my soaked socks and remind myself to wring them out when I get aboard. Weakness consumes me.


Pneumonia


And there is something medieval in this waterway. Something with the water rats.


Plague


By the time the rear end of the hybrid vehicle arrives (it is part train, part tram and part vaporetto) I realise I have to piss. Should I get aboard or should I look for a pissoir and wait for the next one? But I'm suddenly herded forward by the tramsters which makes my indecision moot. "Ok, the next station...my coat pocket...the ticket...my wallet? Wallet? Where's my wallet!" The conductor is forward checking tickets in the demi-monde compartments. I've still got plenty of time, but I need to find my ticket...money...wet shoes and socks...got to piss...mysterious city...

Sometime later I'm aboard the number 13 tram in Zürich. A hefty Oma (German for grandma) is now assisting me out of my damp clothes. I'm naked, but nobody seems to notice or care. There's something comforting and warmly firm and commanding about this buxom old gal that makes me trust her. She's quite animated for such a big woman. "Ja, Sie müssen Ihre nassen socken ausziehen, mein Junge. Legen Sie diese über den Kachelofen da drüben!" (Yes, you have to take off your wet socks and lay them over the tiled oven over there.) She's got my back, this Kitchen Queen of the Night mit Kompressstrumpfhosen. I'm not sick. Everything is old world and good. Ah, Europe!

But while I'm kicking back and wondering at my nakedness, I realise Grandma's got other plans. When she opens her carpet bag I spy her deluxe enema kit complete with hose, stop cock, and rectal tips and I wake up immediately.

34 Comments:

Anonymous Anil said...

A very surreal dream here finnegan, as usual described with a sure hand. I did not see that ending coming. It was a shock and perhaps that is why you woke up too!

7:27 PM  
Blogger finnegan said...

anil
The ending was at 4.00 a.m. Anil. I had a whole other set that rode in after I went back to sleep, without any prodding from Oma.

9:03 PM  
Blogger Alice: In Wonderland or Not said...

Ah to be prodded awake from such a mysterious and warmly vague and frightening dream.

I shan't be anal - lytical on this one; this one analyzes itself and comes out intact

4:00 AM  
Blogger finnegan said...

Alice:IWON
I think in the next part of my dream I went shopping for baggies.

8:07 AM  
Blogger floots said...

nice piece
great title
loved that disrupting orderly puffs of steam image early on
the whole strange places and water thing does it for me too
(spent several minutes trying to come up with dickens/waterway puns but i'm not going to admit it)
like the caring diligent granny too
but that enema
oh no glad you woke up
don't often bother with punctuation
but like you
will end with a :

9:03 AM  
Blogger Bouls said...

Oh My God! This is so funny. It's like you get comfy with this old earth mother image. You're all naked and womb-like in trusting her, and then out of nowhere, you're about to become her science experiment. Very, very twisted. I told you about eating to many Jelly Beans before going to sleep. This is really good, and zaps us into a very unexpected direction. I love the way your stories have such a forward motion, and then something spontaneouly occurs which makes us re-evaluate all that we had just read. But at the same time, in some crazy way it also pulls the whole story together with some outlandish meaning, of course left for our (and most likely your) interpretation. But there feels like there is definately a crazy, common thread to your sub-conscious insanity. I had fun with this one. Thanks Finn.

6:03 PM  
Blogger Bouls said...

Loved the little painting with this. It looks like early Dubaffet (spelling check please). It's really beautiful!

6:06 PM  
Blogger finnegan said...

Floots

Any sort of tinkering with the : will often land you a ;

Thanks for the pun struggles anyway Floots.


Bouls

If you become discombobulated in any way, I feel like it's a standing ovation. The abrupt endings are usually what wake me up
and take notice of where I've been. They are the ones that stick.

My sub-conscious insanity is what makes this life worth living somehow. Nuttersville seems to me the most desirable address of all.

Bouls II "The Return"

Dubuffet? Do you see what it really is? Look closely and you might reconsider your choice of adjectives.

9:21 PM  
Blogger Bouls said...

O.K. Hah, Hah. But it still looks like early Dubuffet in need of a medical emergency! bouls

12:07 AM  
Blogger Queen Neetee said...

What a dream!
I've felt that 'can't find it' frustration in my dreams before. The rush and fear of it all is such a crazy feeling.

There you are again with water, eh? Wet socks and pending wet pants.

Bless her heart that sweet Oma. *hehe* They always seem to know when we're full of it. What a relief they are.

Pneumonia
And there is something medieval in this waterway. Something with the water rats.
This particular section sobbered my easy reading and made me still with a slight fearfulness. I don't know what it is about this. Did those wet socks and clothes take you back to your bad chest cold a few months ago? I thought of it.

Gosh. I enjoyed this. Trying to keep up with you was an amazing trip. I still think I missed boarding one of the trains though.

3:12 AM  
Blogger boudica of suburbia said...

new years dillutions.

xxB

5:05 AM  
Blogger RuKsaK said...

It's all great. It's all great.

However 'linty hole' and the paragraph following 'plague' really blew me away.

Bloody bravo!

1:16 PM  
Blogger Cocaine Jesus said...

Whoah!
Have you and Ruk analysed this one?
Victorian scenes that bleed into anal violence is a worrying dream scene indeed old chum. That Grandma is nothing like my fond memories of mine or anyone else’s Grandma come to that.
And all that disease spreading around this demented dream like a contagion of biblical proportions would worry any sane men. In fact it would even worry a lunatic. (I know this as I am one).
I would be very interested to read your own take on this one.

1:23 PM  
Blogger Perfect Virgo said...

A city of water and steam is perplexing. Water nearly always features in your dreams my friend. I love thje throwaway reference to the vehicle as part vaporetto. No further description necessary!

And yikes! The dreaded "deluxe enema kit!" I really didn't see that one coming Finn...

4:34 PM  
Blogger Sara said...

The deluxe enema kit woke me up immediately too. I love that it's deluxe AND a kit. I like the rhythm and sound in this sentence: "I've still got plenty of time, but I need to find my ticket...money...wet shoes and socks...got to piss...mysterious city..." It very subtly defies predictable rhythm and sound, word order, to put me there with you.

8:02 PM  
Blogger tammy said...

hi Finnigan. thanks for stopping by my blog and for leaving such a wonderful comment (also, thanks for the link. I'm linking you too). I look forward to reading your dreams.

10:35 PM  
Blogger finnegan said...

Bouls ~
Dubuffet in need of an enema is my kind of painting. I'll take two.



Queen Neetee ~
...Wet socks and pending wet pants
Pant 'n' pending?
The Oma surprise made me bolt upright because there was no doubt I'd never have survived her. She'd would no doubt have relieved me of my doodies.
I don't know what it is about this. Did those wet socks and clothes take you back to your bad chest cold a few months ago? I thought of it. Hmm. I hadn't thought about that connection, Neetee---the connection seems to hold a lot of water.


Boudica of Suburbia ~
New ears solution.



RuKsaK ~
Being the true con o'sewer of holes that you are, I'm elated that you appreciated my linty opening; . Maybe I should introduce you to Oma...then run.



Cocaine Jesus ~
Have you and Ruk analysed this one? See RuKsaK above.

If you'd met my real grandmother (who was the sweetest little woman imaginable) this ample Oma makes no sense. Butt then again...

Enough of the ablutions. I mentioned wanting to ask you a few Q's, and so here they are:



1. You mention not being good at remembering your dreams. Does that go for the sexual ones as well?

2. Have you ever sleepwalked?

3. Of the dreams you can remember, which one has left the most indelible impression?

4. Which of the 4 elements do you find least appealing, and why?

5. Of all your blog commenters, which one do you fantasize about the most?*


*email me on this one, R.




Perfect Virgo ~
Water nearly always features in your dreams my friend.
Oh yes it does, indeed. My sign is water, but my feet are definitely more comfortable on terra firma.
"Life of Pi" made me quite uncomfortable with that eternal deep and beastly claustrophobia.
And the vaporetto allusion to the steam wasn't conscious! Your finely-honed eyes picked that one out---made me smile.


Sara ~
Deluxe kits are pretty swell aren't they? Makes me think of cereal boxes and mail-order catalogs---some of my fondest feelings come from such silly things.

The rhythm-and-sound mental muttering is something that goes on incessantly when I'm dreaming. I wish I could record some of those head-inside-my-head audibles. I'd mix it together with sundry loops and beats and dance to it like a damned fool.


Tammy
You're welcome Tammy. Floots of Hamelin tooted me over to you. The door is open to my little blog cottage.

7:42 AM  
Anonymous Blimey Limey said...

Finn, This brings up thoughts of a young Jewish man waiting for a train, unaware that it's destination is the Auschwitz concentration camp. Fra Granny would be conducting the inspection prior to being committed to the gas chamber. I found it very (moving), pardon the pun.

8:23 AM  
Blogger rhein said...

something much too freudian about this dream;).

i think the most telling sentence is this, "...herded forward by...which makes my indecision moot."

well written, as always.

2:50 PM  
Blogger finnegan said...

Rhein
Freud might have been living nearby for all I know. Maybe Oma was his grand daughter doing further field studies for the Institute of Freudian Felching.

7:29 PM  
Blogger finnegan said...

Blimey Limey
Hmm, that idea is a full-stop dead end. Granny now goes from being a serious nuisance to a AAA threat. Blimey indeed.

7:33 PM  
Blogger sirbarrett said...

Uh oh! Looks like you woke up just in time! Kompressstrumpfhosen? Spandex pants? I hate when I can't find my ticket. It always ends up being in my other hand or serving as a bookmark.

2:29 PM  
Blogger Cocaine Jesus said...

i can answer them by e-mail but i will grab those nettles here and now.

1.
my sexual dreams normally turn to either reality or the cliched 'not tonight you pervert' and are pretty average. depends on your bedroom standars though obviously.

2.
No. Never.

3.
There are two. One when Thumbscrew was a child and she was in the garden (in my dream) and a Tiger appeared and moved to eat her. I stood by the door frightened to move. Scared more for myself than my daughter, which I feel rather embarrased about now. Eventually, with a scream that woke the whole house. I threw myself at the cat and then awoke covered in sweat.

The other one still frightens me and I rarely have it anymore. there are these huge balls or boulders or bubbles and they shuffle shift across a vast and vacant plain. there is nothing there apart from these round objects and they move remorselessly onward toward this single stick or totem. i think the stick totem was me and as a child i would wake up weeping and shivering with fear. this was about 62 till 66. a year later The Prisoner appeared on UK TV and there were a similar ballon type thing chasing Patrick MacGohan.

4.
water. fear of drowning.

5.
you!

3:13 PM  
Blogger finnegan said...

Sirbarret ~
Kompressstrumphosen are those scary sexless ace-bandage-like leggings that keep vericose vein noodles from spronging loose and frightening little children and which come in quite handy as make-shift balaclavas and bookmarks.


Cocaine Jesus ~
1.
my sexual dreams normally turn to either reality or the cliched 'not tonight you pervert' and are pretty average. depends on your bedroom standards though obviously.

sounds like a run-of-the-mill bedroom farce to me.


2.
No. Never.

Are you sure about that C.J.? I could've sworn I've seen you traipsing through my rose garden.

3.
There are two. One when Thumbscrew was a child and she was in the garden (in my dream) and a Tiger appeared and moved to eat her. I stood by the door frightened to move. Scared more for myself than my daughter, which I feel rather embarrased about now. Eventually, with a scream that woke the whole house. I threw myself at the cat and then awoke covered in sweat.

The other one still frightens me and I rarely have it anymore. there are these huge balls or boulders or bubbles and they shuffle shift across a vast and vacant plain. there is nothing there apart from these round objects and they move remorselessly onward toward this single stick or totem. i think the stick totem was me and as a child i would wake up weeping and shivering with fear. this was about 62 till 66. a year later The Prisoner appeared on UK TV and there were a similar ballon type thing chasing Patrick MacGohan.

fascinating. i have absolutely nothing to add here, cocaine. a blog unto themselves!

4.
water. fear of drowning.

you and me both, mate!

5.
you!

Holy distended kompressstrumphosen! Then you mean that all my love hasn't been in vein?

9:23 PM  
Blogger Dr. Charles said...

love the suprise *ending*, and the wet feeling of it all. i had a korean roomate once who called his mom "oma" also, amazing the crosscultural lingual homologies.
bring that buxom old grandma over to america!

4:29 AM  
Blogger Cocaine Jesus said...

as for 2. that was just because me and queenie were doing a spot of skinny dipping and your pool, which conveniently sits centre of your rose garden, looked so inviting.
won't happen again i promise.

8:56 AM  
Blogger Shubhodeep said...

nice! [i'm good at lying!;-)]

9:03 AM  
Blogger iamnasra said...

This week Living In Poetry is having a tribute for .:A:. (English-August Blogspot) please visit the blog down below to tell us your thoughts on his writing and poetry


L I P
www.livinginpoetry.blogspot.com

2:20 PM  
Blogger finnegan said...

Dr. Charles
That grandma would definitely get her proverbial Warholian quarter hour of fame, I'm sure.

Cocaine Jesus
Hope you two don't mind my having had the surveillance camera running.

Shubhodeep
as long as you admit it.

lamnasra
Ok

LIP
Check it out

7:02 PM  
Blogger Sue hardy-Dawson said...

Definately time to wake up. Enemas oo

8:13 PM  
Blogger finnegan said...

Sue Hardy-Dawson

I thought of calling it Rectal Granny, but thought it sounded too porny.

7:22 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh man, that Oma is one enema nurse! Terrific dream. Very unique and powerful writing.

11:06 AM  
Blogger Sue hardy-Dawson said...

Arn't rectal grannies dear little old ladies that knit bottom jumpers?

8:08 PM  
Anonymous guernse6 said...

Hi, I have a dream journal as well, and I just wanted to tell you about a weird coincidence. I dreamed an image that is very similar to the picture you posted with this entry. Here is what I wrote in my dream journal:

"The third item I remember very vividly. It was a brown cake baked in a rectangular pyrex dish. On top of the cake, fruit and frosting had been used to depict a top view of a brain scan. A thin line of frosting ran away from the 'brain' to signify the spinal cord."

I linked to this picture to illustrate:

http://www.coloradocollege.edu/Dept/PC/RepresentativePhy/Pages/Photoshop/Problem%20Pictures/Brain%20pic.jpg

... but your picture depicts what I saw much more accurately.

I just thought that was a weird coincidence, so I thought I'd share that. You can read the whole entry here:

http://www.msu.edu/~guernse6/dreams.html#TimeTravelElectionDay

Thanks a lot, I enjoy your journal!

11:27 AM  

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